Tea Party Patriots Under Cover of Night

George Rebane

Tonight we made it to a gathering of the local Tea Party Patriots (aka teabaggers) in the Grass Valley Elks Lodge.  I estimate that over three hundred of Nevada County’s rightwing extremists packed themselves into that hall.  It was advertized as a celebration of the movement’s success here and across the country – fifteen million of us out there now.  For cover, the TPP leaders had arranged for a band, no-host bar, free fat pills (aka desserts), four of the county's Supes in attendance, and they even had Congressman McClintock there to speak.  It would have fooled most people.

But everyone knew better.  What we were all there for was to collect our monthly pay-off checks from the fat cat corporations that were bankrolling the organization.  For the last year we’ve done our best to make it look like a grass roots affair.  But early on, the feds led by Speaker Pelosi and Homeland Security Administration’s Napolitano saw through the whole thing and blew the whistle on us. Now we have to come up with all kinds of silly excuses to get together so that we can get paid and be given new marching orders.

Russ Steele and I were there with our wives, wine glasses in hand, applauding the speakers and trying to make it all look normal when who but cartoonist Bob Crabb walks up and sits down next to me.  After exchanging a couple of panicked glances with Russ, I decided to engage Bob with some small talk seeing as how all three of us now worked for The Union.  I thought I was doing a good job, but Bob kept glancing around.  It was only a matter of time until he would spot the big fat manila envelope with the checks, and the clipboard with the sign-off sheets that were quietly passed from table to table.

If he did see it, he didn’t let on.  Bob’s a cool character, he’s been there and done that, and he knows better than to talk while the flavor lasts.  I guess we’ll know when his next cartoon appears in the newspaper.  All we can do now is hope for the best.

Comments

[Russ]

I thought the rock bands was a real nice touch in our cover, we could shout with each other and the folks at the next table would never know what we were talking about our liberal friends. You and Bob Crabb spent so much time shouting in each others ear, I am sure the other tables noticed, and they all appreciated your effort to keep Bob occupied so he could not discover the real purpose of our gathering. Well done!

[bill tozer]

Thanks for the chuckle. I would caution you on disclosing the silly excuses for the gathering. It is just a matter of time before someone with a cell phone takes a picture of the sign-off sheets and sends proof of the conspiracy around the globe.

[George Rebane]

Good point Bill. Loose lips sink ships and all that.

[RL Crabb]

I missed the envelopes full of cash. Guess I was having too much fun hanging with you and Russ (Mr. Science) Steele. What I did see was a room full of old friends and new faces. Politics is the smorgasbord of cartoonists, and I have a lot to chew on this morning. You'll have to wait till Saturday to read my review.

[Steven Frisch]

Pray tell who were the four Supes? I would have gone if I was not busy with work yesterday.

[George Rebane]

I did not see District #5 represented.

[Steve Enos]

George, how would you feel if you found out a main TPP leader trespassed and tore down campaign signs during an election? How would you feel about that person violating the Constitutional Rights of others by doing this? How would you feel if this is fact, not rumor and when this person was caught he begged that it be kept quite and that it not be reported to the Sheriff? And how would you feel if this same person makes public speeches about protecting the Constitution and things like free speech and property rights?? Who would you feel if when given the opportunity to deny or explain the incident this same person stopped communicating and refuses to respond?

George, what would you think of such a person, would you consider this person to be a hypocrite, would you consider this person to be a leader that you would follow? George, I’ll email you the details and maybe you can ask this person to explain the truth to you and maybe you can then consider if this is a person of integrity that represents the truth and the rights of the Constitution.

[George Rebane]

Looking forward to the email SteveE.

[Russ]

From the Economist: America’s most vibrant political force at the moment is the anti-tax tea-party movement.

[Steven Frisch]

Yeah it was a tough night to get off the hill. For those of us that went up and down a couple of times this week, which I know Ted did, going over the hill on Saturday night was a little out of the question.

[bill tozer]

George, now you have reaaly done it!!! In today's police blotter there is a complaint by a woman caller on the 100 block of S. School Street stating there was loud music coming from a meeting hall. Was it the music or was it you shouting into Mr. Crabb's ear?

[George Rebane]

Thanks for the compliment Bill; no one, but no one would mistake my shouting in Bob Crabb's ear for music (no matter how contemporary) ;-)

[Dixon Cruickshank]

Steve probably better you didn't make it - everybody has cell phone cameras today and it would have been like that Olynpic swimmer guy and you would have been outted and ostrisized by your people

[Steven Frisch]

Dixon--my people have more class, and understand intellectual curiosity.